Travis and Cole had been invited to go to Conconully, WA and stay at a friends' house for a hunting weekend. Cole could have gone racing that weekend as our boys were heavily into motocross for years. But Cole said he'd rather go hunting, so they planned.
(The photo is Cole standing in front of where his father passed away.)
Friday morning, I was laying in bed while Travis got up and dressed to head out. He bent over the bed to give a good bye kiss. I grabbed him and pulled him down on me while I gave him a bit of a better and longer hug. He gave me a kiss and walked out of the house. That would be the last time that I saw my big teddy bear. Held him and kissed him. . . . even a good bye. Of course, had I known, I'd have never let go!
Friday afternoon, Travis called me to say hello, but where they were located, his phone had rough service. I had just gotten my car picked up from being detailed and was quite happy with how clean and pretty it was! I knew Travis took pride in me taking pride of my things, so I was telling him how clean the car was. That I'd be taking my Beamer in the spring to have Johnnie detail it too. Like I said, I wanted him to be proud that I wanted to take care of the things that he worked hard to get for me. That was basically our last "conversation", which was full of cut offs from bad service.
The next morning, it was raining and miserable outside yet Abigail had a soccer game at 9AM. For some reason, kids love playing in the rain! We arrived at the soccer field around 9:08ish, and Abby waited on the sideline for her turn to rotate in. I felt bad she was late, but that's how we are, unfortunately. As Josh, Kyleigh and I stood under our umbrellas in the pouring down rain, Abby got called out onto the field. After Abby had been out on the field for about ten minutes, my cell phone rang. I noticed I didn't recognize the number, but I answered it. It was Andrew Denham, the friend whose house Travis and Cole were staying at while hunting. I thought, "Travis' phone must not have had good service or something so Andrew was calling to check in and say hi for Travis to let me know his phone was having issues." Then Andrew's voice said, "Hi Dawn. This is Andrew. " I said, "Oh. Hello. How are you?" He responded with a, "I'm calling to let you know that I'm in the hospital." As soon as he said that, I thought like I normally do on a weekend with my guys gone (eventho Josh was home), "Dirtbike crash? No. They aren't racing this weekend. Hospital? Hunting. Who got hurt? Accidentally shot? That happens!" Andrew continued with his call to me, "I'm in the hospital with Cole." Okay. What does that mean? Cole is hurt? I asked, "What happened? Is Cole okay?" Andrew continued, "Cole is okay. That is why I am calling you." I thought to myself again, "Cole is okay. That means . . Travis isn't okay?? Did he accidentally get shot? Did he trip or fall?" I asked Andrew, "Cole is okay. Is Travis okay?!" Andrew said back, "That is why I am calling you, Dawn. He isn't." Did Andrew say anything after that? I don't remember. Cause it hit me that Travis was gone! I knew what happened. He'd had a heart attack and was gone!
Standing under that umbrella in the pouring rain, Kyleigh and Josh were watching and listening to my phone conversation. By this point, they knew I was on the phone with Andrew and he was in a hospital. They also had heard me say that Cole was okay.
Abby was playing soccer in the background and oblivious to our situation. I literally did what you see on television: nothing but yell, "Nooo!" Josh and Ky got worried and asked what was wrong. I don't remember how I told them, just that I did as we stood there in the rain. Cole got on the phone and told me how things played out:
"Dad was just fine all morning. Frank, Dad and I were hunting together. We had just been out maybe ten minutes when I noticed Dad wasn't behind me. It was still kind of dark. Around 6:00 in the morning. I called out to Dad asking if he was alright. He just hollered back that he had to pee. I stood there waiting and it ended up being a bit of time for him to just pee. When he showed up, he said that he had to take a dump too. The three of us started walking again and Dad said to Frank and me, "Don't worry about me. I'll keep up." Then Frank said back, "No. We're fine. We'll go your pace. No big deal." About a minute later, I noticed again that Dad wasn't behind me. I turned around and started walking towards him. He was laying on the ground and unconscious. The ground there was so rocky that at first, I thought maybe he slipped and hit his head on a rock. I ran to him and rolled him over, but there were no marks on his head. I left Frank with Dad and ran to the truck to use the radio and call for help."
Cole went back to the truck, and the only other information I've gotten from him about the situation is that they performed CPR on Travis for an hour. Cole said to me, "I know that it's probably wrong for the son to be the first one to give up on his father, but after ten minutes, I knew he was gone. I just knew he was gone." I don't judge Cole one bit here. I am touched by how he was so aware and in tune with things to say he knew that his dad was gone. I just can't dwell too much on imagining what Cole, my eldest child, went through up there on the mountain with his best friend, father, his EVERYTHING . . . . leaving him. Nothing else in this world could EVER be worse to imagine! I am just so sorry, Cole! When I think about it, though, I feel Travis must have known something was coming. He left us (minus what poor Cole went through) the best way he would have ever wanted. He was doing something that he loved with, honestly, his favorite person in the world. (I've accepted this years ago!) Travis wouldn't have wanted me to see him in this way either.
I told Josh to get Abby but not to say anything. Poor Abby got yanked off the soccer field from where she had JUST GOTTEN and dragged to the car while Ky, Josh and I were bawling. I did not want Abby to hear that her father had passed away as we walked to the car in the rain. Problem was, she saw us all crying and frantic. Of course, she started crying too, only cause we were. She kept asking what was wrong. "Let's get home and we will talk about it there," I said.
Don't ask me how we got home. I only know that we did. Josh had driven his truck and I had driven my car. I had Kyleigh ride with Josh home while I had Abby and two of the Zaiss girls (friends who were living in their motorhome in our yard at the time) also. I called Josh on his phone as I drove home, telling him to pay attention to where he was driving when he asked, "Where are we going?" I answered, "Home, Josh. Just go home and pay attention to your driving. Drive careful." I didn't know what we were going to do! Go to Omak and see Travis? Was this real? It had to be real. Cole wouldn't lie to me. If he really said Travis had a heart attack and had left us, I believed him. I felt terrible for Cole and wanted only to be with him, but he was 4 hours away! Before we actually left the soccer field, Cole had called me back and explained to me that there was no reason for me to drive over there. He was going to be on his way home soon, and the funeral home would transport Travis.
I pulled up the driveway with Josh and Kyleigh behind us. We all piled into the house and I walked Abby to the couch where we sat down. With Abby on my lap, I looked at her and told her that "Daddy and Cole were hunting in the mountain this morning. Daddy's heart got tired and stopped working. They couldn't get it working again, and Daddy's spirit has gone to be with Heavenly Father." Me, Joshua, Kyleigh and Abigail all sat on the couch and cried together as the news continued to sink in.
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